somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
nutella sex= disaster
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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