and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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