I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Randomize
