he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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