i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
