Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
