When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
