Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
