just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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