Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Randomize
