I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I think a kid would responsible me up
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
