quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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