I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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