Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
