Who did Billy Mays play for?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
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