Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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