The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
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Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
So. Much. Porn.
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