We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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