I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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