Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
