So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Randomize
