Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize