I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
