doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
How does one acquire holy water?
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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