i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
