Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
