3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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