Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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