Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
...so i touched it.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
