My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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