Where are you?
In a non slutty way
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
