it wasn't lemon gatorade
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
pray to the hookup gods
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
