You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
