am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
