I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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