Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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