it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
