We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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