i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
