thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
She's the barista slut.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
