The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
