Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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