i just google imaged poop.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Randomize
