So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Boobs are out for the taking
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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