I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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