At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize