I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
