How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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