I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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