It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
