I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
