Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
