is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
