**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
so let's talk penis.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
