You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
