I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Randomize
