They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
